falsehoods, fears and fantasies.

you return to me stronger

i’ve exhausted every metaphor there is.

every analogy.

i’ve sacrificed the only eternal product of me; my words,

that even they don’t come close to capturing who you are.

partly because i don’t know you

partly because you’ve been stuck in my head for more than i can remember…

that when you come back each time,

you come back more abstracted;

more of a product of my own creation.

and i continue to delve into this realm i call loneliness

because i’m constrained by the borders of my expectations

that you no longer represent ‘you’

you symbolize everyman i’ve come across…

you represent the filtered version of the men in my life

you represent every deleted memory of abrupt anger fits.

you represent my contained dreams

you are the beacon of hope for everything that isn’t,

for everything that never was

that my english s l o w l y

b

    r

        e

               a

                     k

                            s

and you leave me bare

all i’ve got left are these feelings

of falsehood,

of fantasy.

and i keep on expecting more

and my fears for the future grow deeper

and i’m left alone with these thoughts

wondering if i’m built to share,

if i’m built to

love

and to be loved.